Mario Chaos Bloopers
by KhaosOmega
Summary: my take on the iSqueakers 'Mario Scenes Gone Wrong' fic. Different bloopers, extreme hilarity. Rated T for some bloopers.
1. Super Mario Bros

**Disclaimer: The following KhaosOmega fanfic is a variation of an iSqueakers fanfic. Mario belongs to Nintendo. Please support the official release.**

**Chapter 1: Super Mario Bros.**

Mario: Hey, everyone. Mario here with a funny mishap-filled clip show from the Mario series games. Now, you think all games are perfect right from the start, right?

Luigi: Well, it didn't start out that way. These clips prove that it took the Nintendo guys some time to get the games right. First up is 'Super Mario Bros.'. Okay, Jet, roll 'em.

Jet: You got it, Luigi. (rolls first clip)

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Super Mario Bros. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

-Mario's Sore Hand-

Mario is walking along a level, reaching a block above him containing several coins. A Koopa Troopa is standing on it when Mario jumps to hit that block.

The Koopa jumped and slammed himself on the top of the block to counter Mario's hit from below. This combination continued for twenty seconds before pain shot through Mario.

Mario: MY HAND!

Koopa: Nice try, plumber.

Director: CUT!

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Mario: Man, that hurt. I needed an ice pack for that. And this was before the Ground Pound technique was implemented for Mario games.

Luigi: Yeah, that particular Koopa was too smart for the hit-the-ground-it's-on-from-below routine. Here's another funny one i found randomly.

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-False Bowser's Bad Hair Day-

Mario's charging through the castle making up world 3-4, and eventually reaches the end, where a False Bowser stands. Mario has the Fire Flower as his active powerup, and unloads a number of them at the boss. His aim, though, was too high.

Mario: Yo, dude, your hair's on fire.

False Bowser: YEEOWCH!

Director: CUT!

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Mario: What, i had aim issues back then. Then again, i was still getting used to using the Fire Flower anyway.

Luigi: Oh, i know. Your first experience with that item was HILARIOUS!

Mario: What do ya mean, bro?

Luigi: Roll clip number 2154.

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-Flower-Induced Burn-

Mario is in World 1-1, and under the effects of a Mushroom, when he hits a block that spawns a Fire Flower. Grabbing it turns Mario red cap and shirt white and his overalls red. But something flickering on his rear end catches him by surprise.

Mario: YEEOWCH!

Waluigi: CUT!

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Mario: How the heck did Waluigi get there?! He didn't enter the series until some point during the Nintendo 64 era of games.

Luigi: I dunno. Maybe the director was sick that day and they called in Waluigi at random. After all, he did call that one Mario Power Tennis blooper's end.

Mario: You mean the one with a weight-lifting Wario on his cellphone?

Luigi: Bingo.

Mario: There is another way to defeat the various Bowsers in the castles, but that didnt' succeed the first attempt either. Roll clip number 8719.

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-Blunt Ax-

Mario, in world 5-4, is in the middle of battling that world's False Bowser, trying to get past his attacks. He's in his small form currently, having taken a hit earlier in the level, when he manages to get past him and reaches the ax. He takes a swing, but doesn't cut the ropes holding the bridge. Seventeen attempts later and the bridge is still up.

Mario: Who blunted the ax?

At this point Waluigi, disguised as a Hammer Bro., comes up from behind Mario, hits him from behind, and then sends both the plumber and False Bowser into the lava beneath the bridge, severing the ropes with the real ax.

Waluigi: Now to give that blonde some real punishment.

Director: CUT!

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Mario: Good timing with the cut on that one, 'cause i was afraid Waluigi was gonna rape Peach.

Luigi: Yeah. That was what caused Waluigi to miss out on a good amount of the action in the Mario series.

Jet: And now, the last clip of the day. Rolling number 5124.

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-Raining Spinies-

Mario, charging through World 4-1, is in his Fire form at the time when a number of clouds roll in. Then a number of red eggs with spikes on them fall in rapid succession.

Mario: SPINIES!

Instinctively, Mario takes off running, but more Spinies fall behind him causing a number of collisions. Then the plumber catches a Spiny with his cap and launches it back at the Lakitu swarm. One of the cloub-borne Koopas takes the hit in the mouth, falling out of his cloud, which is then nabbed by Mario as the others rush to their fallen ally.

Mario: (hurling Spinies at the other Lakitus while flying away) SO LONG, SUCKAS!

While flying away and looking at the Lakitus, Mario hits the back of his head on a block and falls into a bottomless pit.

Director: CUT!

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Mario: Who's the idiot who put that block there. Man, that hurt.

Luigi: Watch where you're going next time.

Jet: Next time, we'll be doing a number of Super Mario Bros. 2 bloopers. Until then, folks.


	2. Super Mario Bros 2

**Disclaimer: The following is a KhaosOmega fanfic. The Mario franchise belongs to Nintendo. Please support the official release.**

**Mario Chaos Bloopers, Chapter 2**

**Super Mario Bros. 2**

Mario: Hey, everyone. Your host, Mario, here with the Super Mario Bros. 2 installment of Mario Chaos Bloopers. Now, there were some very funny ones in this game, and the following clips are some of the funniest.

Luigi: You got that one right, bro. This first one was especially funny to our clips guy, Jet.

Jet: Rolling clip number 13804.

* * *

- Fighting the Wind -

Peach is running along a level, maybe world 1-1, when she takes off into the air with a jump. Unlike the other characters, Peach has a special hover ability, enabling her to reach places distance-wise that Luigi is able to. However, a huge gust of wind happens to blow by her, sending her flying away.

Peach: Really?!

After flying over one hundred meters, she finally hits the ground, facefirst, near Mario with her face away from the red-clad plumber. The skirt portion of her dress has ridden up a ways on her, exposing her rear end. What was there totally surprised Mario.

Mario: Wasn't expecting that.

Director: CUT!

* * *

When the scene returns to the studio the clip show is being aired at, Jet's rolling all over the place laughing very hard. Twenty seconds later he stops, gasping for breath.

Jet: Now i know how Jeff Dunham felt after the chihuahua with the incorrectly-placed stick bit.

Mario: That dog put the stick in her mouth facing frontwards instead of sideways, didn't she?

Jet: Yeah. Anyway, here's clip number 17298, showing some of the issues pulling veggies up.

* * *

- Veggie Pulling Issue, Take One -

Mario and Peach are following the grass area of world 1-1, when Mario reaches a tuft of grass. Deciding to see what's hidden under it, he grabs the leaves on top and begins to pull. However, he can't get the veggie out of the ground, pulling so hard a farting noise occurs, with a massive gust of wind that sends Peach flying away.

Mario: I hope Bowser doesn't get her.

Director: CUT!

* * *

Mario: Hey, at least that was better than clip 17299.

Jet: Rolling.

* * *

- Veggie Pulling Issue, Take Two -

Just like 17298, Mario and Peach are exploring world 1-1 when the tuft of grass is reached. Everything happens the same as in 17298, except for Peach still standing where she was, albeit without her usual dress.

Mario: That wasn't supposed to happen.

Director: CUT!

* * *

Luigi: You know, Mario, at least that wasn't as embarrasing as clip 17300.

Mario: Uh-oh.

Jet: Rolling.

* * *

- Veggie Pulling Issue, Take Three -

As with 17298 and 17299, everything up until Mario begins pulling the veggie happens exactly the same. This time, however, instead of the farting noise and wind gust, a ripping noise occurs. Startled, Mario jumps up and realizes his overalls ripped in a certain spot.

Mario: Oh, boy, this is embarrasing.

Director: CUT!

* * *

Mario: Good thing those were my number seventy-five reserve overalls.

Jet: Sure, that may have been quite embarrasing, but here's one that topped that in the humiliation factor. Rolling clip number 17301.

* * *

- Veggie Pulling Issue, Take Four -

While Mario's switching to a different pair of overalls in an unknown Subcon location, Peach reaches the troublesome veggie alone. Peach has even more trouble pulling it out compared to Mario due to a weaker strength level. Then, all of a sudden, a strange smell starts emanating.

Peach: I hope this isn't what i think it is.

Afraid of what the possible result could be, Peach lifts her dress and discovers what confirmed her worst fear: She had wet herself.

Director: CUT!

* * *

Jet's laughing even harder than before, flat on his back, when the scene returns to the clip show studio.

Mario: Nobody's perfect, as that one person says.

Luigi: Good point. Anyway, that's all for the Super Mario Bros. 2 installment of Mario Chaos Bloopers. Until next time, see you all later.


	3. Super Mario Bros 3

**Me: Hey, guys. KhaosOmega here with the latest installment of Mario Chaos Bloopers. This is the Super Mario Bros. 3 chapter. But first, here's Luigi with the disclaimer.**

**Luigi: The following is a KhaosOmega fanfic. The Mario franchise belongs to Nintendo, though some of the bloopers Khaos came up with. Please support the official release.**

**Chapter 3: Super Mario Bros. 3**

Mario: Hey, everyone. Your red-clad host Mario here with the latest clip set from the Mario Series. This time it's Super Mario Bros. 3.

Luigi: And here's the green-clad host, Luigi. This game introduced a couple new powerups, and one was quite funny the first time Mario encountered it. Now to the clip manager, in the blue, Jet.

Jet: Thanks Luigi. here's clip number 13101.

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- Raccoon Pain -

This clip starts out with Mario barreling through World 1-1, when he gains a Raccoon Leaf.

Mario: YEEOWCH! (the Raccoon tail caused some heavy pain, and right where the burn from his first Fire Flower experience was).

Director: CUT!

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Mario: Bad placement of that one.

Jet: Just like the timing on that one earthquake in California, when Walter told his grandson to pull his finger not two seconds prior. Kid pulled it, Walter farted and half the neighborhood fell down.

Mario: Never heard it put quite that way before.

Jet: That kid hasn't come near him since.

Luigi: Anyway, here's another Raccoon Leaf experience, but with a Dragon Ball Z reference included.

Jet: Rolling clip number 13102.

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- Raccoon Saiyan?! -

Mario is in World 1-1 again, when he gains the Raccoon Leaf. No pain is experienced this time, but he does feel like something's off.

Mario: I've never heard of a Saiyan with a raccoon tail.

Director: CUT!

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Luigi: That was completely odd.

Jet: Hey, KhaosOmega had a similar confuser possibility in GA2CA with that catgirl-like character.

Mario: Okay, we could only find three clips for this game, but anyway, here's clip number 21987.

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- Block Issues -

Mario is in the midst of the final battle with Bowser, and it starts out rather even. Then Bowser jumps and makes a ground pound attempt on the plumber, but misses his target. Before Mario can reach the door on the far side of the battlefield, all of the blocks making the field up have collapsed into a hole, and Mario falls in as well as Bowser. On the platform above the door, a girl, blonde with teal highlights and in a crimson t-shirt with a purple stylized v on it, appears and begins to edge towards the door.

Director: CUT!

Alpha: AW, COME ON!

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Jet: Darn, how did Alpha manage to get into that clip?

Luigi: At least Z29 sorted her out afterwards.

Mario: Yeah, and that's the end of the Super Mario Bros. 3 installment of Mario Chaos Bloopers. Next time it will be Mario Party 1 as the focus of the story.


End file.
